Welcome back to to those of you returning and hello new listeners! Its Wednesday and hot off the presses here is episode two! I can not describe how pleased we are with how many people took the time to download and (i hope) listen to our first show. This one right here is more of the same but better! We are going to try our damnedest to make the best podcast on the internet featuring a man in drag talking with a panel of people about how scary it would be to have Bugs Bunny as a nemesis.
Along with the weekly Podcast those of you in Toronto can be a part of our first LIVE! show this Sunday January 18th at the Central. The show starts promptly at 7pm on the upstairs level. Tickets can still be purchased online at the LIVE! section of this website. For more information follow me on Facebook. Live is really how we want to present this podcast and i want to see you guys this weekend!
One last thing, despite all our downloads we have yet to receive any listener e-mails. So i am challenging you guys! Send me your Love/Hate mail to firstname.lastname@example.org. Tell us how much you loved the show, or how much you hated it! Then you guys have a chance for me to respond directly to you on one of the show intros in the future.
Lets dig into this thing! Click the link below to Download (right click and choose save link as...) or play the episode in our very own embedded player! Cant wait to know the questions in this show? Click Read More at the bottom of the post for detailed show notes!
See you next Would You Rather? Wednesday,
This weeks panel:
Your host: Velvet Valhalla - www.VelvetValhalla.com
Produced by: Alex Woodside
Running time: 01:06:19
00:00:20 - Velvet and producer Alex Woodside talk about how amazing you guys are for downloading episode one!
00:01:15 - Help us get on Itunes by sacrificing a cattle to the Apple gods
00:01:35 - Send us Love/Hate emails at email@example.com
00:02:55 - WE ALMOST FALL OFF THE RAILS!! STAY ON THE RAILS!!
00:03:22 - January 18th, Would You Rather? with Velvet Valhalla LIVE at the central information
00:03:55 - Alex Woodside loves Velvets nipples
00:05:37 - Guest panel introductions featuring the greatest worst intro ever.
00:05:55 - Morgan White speaks with us about his new documentary The Slippers
00:07:45 - Morgan talks about holding the Maltese Falcon
00:09:23 - Leelando gets smacked for not turning off his phone, then speaks about his current projects.
00:10:06 - Morgan White corrects Leeland about sea life.
00:11:12 - Maria Juana talks about her new show, The Burlesque Oscars (http://www.eventbrite.ca/e/the-burlesque-oscars-tickets-15252443469) along with her day job as a travel agent.
00:12:20 - International Village Idiot Conor Doyle tells us how he is on the verge of buying a bed.
00:12:58 - How to save money- with Maria Juana
00:13:34 - CRACK MATTRESS!
00:14:06 - Crack mattresses make great sound proofing.
00:14:36 - How to consume cocaine and peanut butter
00:14:56 - First question!
You have been given a divine gift, your hands have become empowered,
would you rather;
have your hands empowered with the touch of growth
or the touch of healing?
00:15:30 - Leeland wants to go to Kenya. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=218hqY1MyHI
00:15:47 - Leeland also wants to be Uma Thurman in a pink Gorilla suit. http://youtu.be/sUgUMY-C7MY?t=1m16s
00:16:00 - Then Leeland wants to be to be Ghandi. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCaeQnd35gY
00:16:14 - Finally he settles on Hindi sad diamonds Satine from Moulin Rouge (i suck and can not find video on that one)
00:17:02 - Maria wants to help the world “If you don't have your health you have nothing”
00:18:04 - Conor cashes in on his power of growth.
00:18:35 - Conor will ruin your garden out of spite! Don't mess with his Irish garden!
00:19:03 - Conor solves worlds issu… never mind its the most elitist and commercial way possible to use the power of growth.
00:19:28 - Morgan White Hates people. Screw people and their diseases!
00:19:43 - Velvet lays down the negatives of the power of healing.
00:20:10 - Now Leeland wants to be the new Jesus with Madonna playing at all times. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDnUIXF2ly8
00:20:39 - Going to church with Leeland
00:22:22 - Leelend is now going to be in a cute virgin Mary outfit. Also he is scared of Madonna.
00:23:08 - Accurate pictures of Sarah Jessica Parker. http://i.imgur.com/hpJkZ.jpg
00:23:27 - Maria weighs the positives of the power of growth.
00:24:06 - Morgan White thinks the world is overpopulated.
00:24:41 - Tree sap boukaki
00:24:55 - Morgan will do… stuff and grow… things?
00:25:43 -Second question!
Choose your hell.
Would you rather;
Be in a classic hell scenario where your flesh is consistently seared by the ejaculate of masturbating demons.
Or; your confined in a chair and paralyzed with your eyelids cut off watching a montage of every time your parents had sex and went to the bathroom.
00:26:33 - Morgan says this is the best question yet. That sick fuck. The debate begins!
00:26:54 - Morgan thinks its normal for people to have sex while pooping on each other. That sick fuck.
00:27:53 - Conor things he can find the softer side of the demons.
00:28:10 - the panel discusses the serious topic of the pearl eyepatch.
00:30:05 - Do guys always want to cum on a womans face? vote here! http://strawpoll.me/3396565
00:30:47 - Men need to start cum shot target practice. Ladies love a good aim.
00:31:51 - Leeland is scared of seeing his parents crying on the Toilet. He has been there and its not fun.
00:32:16 - Conor has never been Cumed on. Leeland wants to demonstrate.
00:32:44 - Leeland wants a man who will basically be a condiment dispenser.
00:33:44 - Conor has seen his parents have sex multiple times. Has never been cumed on
00:34:33 - Velvet breaks down the cinematography of the poop and sex montage videos.
00:35:36 - If your parents shit in the woods, will it still make a sound or be part of the video?
00:36:22 - Maria explores the idea of being so hot that demons need to cum on you for all eternity.
00:37:03 - Maria describes her perfect demon.
00:37:42 - Would You Rather LIVE! promo! Come on out to the Central this Sunday January 18th. Show starts at 7pm.
00:38:30 - Third Question!
Would you rather;
eat a snowbank with your favorite snow cone flavor
or drink a pond with your favorite drink crystals. Both have the same volume.
00:38:40 - Conor attempts to be cute and gets called out.
00:39:27 - Morgans point number one - Brain freeze
00:40:28 - Morgans point number two - Peeing, which adds more volume. Note hes ok with drinking piss. That sick fuck.
00:40:51 - How clean are both options?
00:41:14 - Conor is the only person at the table who understands ponds.
00:42:46 - Leeland and the gang have found a way to make money to drink a pond. Conor thinks there is a snowbank market.
00:42:57 - Maria tells us her ideal pond situation.
00:44:09 - Conor and Morgan debate ponds and how clean they are.
00:45:21 - Morgan chooses a diet option for his pond. You know, so he wont get diabetes.
00:47:29 - Fourth Question!
You have been given the choice between living in two alternate realities. Would you rather;
be a secondary character in the Muppet Universe who is always called upon by the Muppets on a caper.
Or, being a third rate student at hogwarts academy in the Wizzarding World, and broom restringer for the quiddich team.
00:48:22 - Morgan gets excited about being a special guest star. He is currently a special guest star on this podcast!
00:49:05 - Leeland talks about the “fun” of being a puppet.
00:49:18 - Swedish Chef gives the best fisting.
00:49:44 - Swedish Chef dirty talk
00:50:21 - Maria lays the SMACK DOWN! on being a Witch in the potterverse.
00:52:26 - Everyone at the table but Maria wants to be a puppets lackey.
00:52:41 - Everyone takes offense at using spells vs the Muppets.
00:53:30 - Morgan loves the damn Muppets.
00:55:22 - The Nemesis question!
Who would you rather have as your nemesis;
All birds everywhere,
or all primates in a 50 mile radius of your location.
00:56:16 - Ikea Monkey and the hidden primates paradox
00:56:50- Morgan wants a relaxed city job being a Ghostbuster. If Ghostbusters were hunting Monkeys.
00:58:05 - Zoo’s are built to hold raging primates. RAGE!!!
00:59:05 - Leeland finds the bird situation terrifying. He also hates closets of monkeys. Also he thinks he looks like a monkey.
01:01:37 - Morgan things that zoos have a plan for hordes of escaping monkeys.
01:02:25 - Maria brings up more hidden monkeys. Like this one http://tinyurl.com/nz2syeg
01:02:46 - Velvet is convinced that one monkeys gets to you its over. MONKEYS HAVE HANDS!!
01:03:35 - Maria is scared of being swarmed by birds. However monkeys can also swarm just not at often.
01:04:39 - Leeland wants to be monkey peter from Jumanji (r.i.p. Robin Williams)
01:05:22 - Show close and Panel goodbyes!
Follow Velvet on Social media! Links located in the sidebar!
See you all next week!
Music Credit: "There It Is" by Kevin MacLeod http://incompetech.com